Gain Some Social Skills Using Self-Hypnosis
Not everyone has good social skills. There are some people who do not know how to handle themselves in social situations. This can be very awkward at times. While there are some behavioral classes one can attend, they are not always foolproof. Some work only to a certain extent. You might also never use the tools you receive in such classes, forums or discussions. Hypnotherapy, on the other hand, is very effective. It is the surest way to be able to get over social anxiety and get some social skills.
For some people, being in a social situation can cause anxiety. This anxiety could be manifested in panic attacks. The person could also stay in a corner all alone and not bother to interact with other people for fear of saying or doing the wrong thing. Reactions vary across the population.
You can use self-hypnosis to change the way you approach social situations. You can download some online MP3 resources for this. How this works is that you insert ideas into the subconscious by bypassing the conscious. This way, your brain is able to respond appropriately in these situations. In a sense, you teach your brain on what type of message to send when you find yourself in a social situation.
Simulations and Behavior Rectification
For self-hypnosis to work, you have to create simulations to teach the brain how to react. This would be more effective with the help of a professional hypnotherapist. However, these services are very expensive and available to only those who can afford it. Therefore, ensure that the resource you download has some examples of different social situations. During these simulations, you will be tasked with handling yourself around other people.
When under hypnosis, your brain is open to suggestion. You relay to your brain how to handle other people and avoid awkward moments. When you are faithful with the sessions, you will notice a change in your interactions. You will be more comfortable with other people, thrive in social situations and initiate conversation and interactions among other things.
How to Become Popular
Hypnotherapy will also help you to become popular if that is your desire. You can teach your brain different social cues that make you a more likeable person. Once you download this plan, for example, you can create time to go through the different sessions. After a while, you will notice the changes. You have more friends, people like to hang around you a lot, and people invite you to their social functions and so on.
As is with any other form of treatment, consistency is an important aspect. In order to reap all the benefits associated with self-hypnosis, you need to be consistent in following the sessions. Different resources are also structured and formulated by different experts. This means that the resources work in a unique way for each person. You are therefore advised against expecting that someone else’s results will be replicated for you as well.
Tips for Building Every Type of Relationship
There are some things we can do in all our relationships to build and maintain strong bonds. This is true because underneath all our differences, likes, dislikes, and biases, we are all human beings who desire social connections. The tips below should be used in all your relationships to form bonds that will stand the test of time.
This might mean different things in different relationships, but the overarching sentiment is the same. When they do something kind for you or take the time to support you when you need it, be appreciative - acknowledge their care and concern.
Spend Time Together
It can be hard to find time to get together when we are all so busy, but it’s important for all relationships. If necessary, set up a standing appointment so that it just automatically happens. This makes sure it happens because you will get used to scheduling other things around it.
Sometimes you may be tempted to bend the truth to avoid conflict, but your relationships will be much healthier overall if honesty is held in high regard. It’s possible, to be honest without being brutal. Choose your words carefully and be as diplomatic as possible, while still sharing your feelings openly and honestly.
Forgive them for their eccentricities and annoying habits, and also forgive yourself for any mistakes you make. We all have faults and shortcomings that we bring with us into any relationship. Sometimes to keep the relationship strong, we need to just come to the conclusion that their presence in our lives is more important than the little habits that drive us crazy.
Intermingled between all the good times, there will surely be times when the other person could use a helping hand. Whether it’s helping them move, taking them dinner when a loved one has passed or being a sounding board for a difficult decision, any relationship worth having requires some TLC. And the other person deserves it, just as you do when you need it from them.
Do Unto Others
It’s just a good idea to always live by the Golden Rule, but it’s especially true in relationships that are important to us. If you wonder if something you might do is likely to upset them, chances are it’s better to talk to them about it first. Wouldn’t you want them to do the same for you? It’s better to err on the side of caution.
Interaction of Social Skills and Personality
There are happy and unhappy introverted personalities in this world. Artists, writers, composers, and many others in such professions indicate that social isolation is necessary for their work. It is. Some of those people do not have many friends and believe that all they need in life are just a few friends who were faithful and caring. They are the happy introverts.
Nevertheless, all human beings have the basic need for at least a modest amount of social skills and interaction, even those engaged in such professions. Without some degree of social communication, total isolation can result in neurosis and psychological disturbance. If you prod your memory, you can recall many out-of-work actors and artists who have committed suicide. They let the isolation get out of control, and that’s an awful misfortune.
Even introverts need to learn how to feel comfortable in social situations. Life, as well as basic human needs, demands it. A writer might need to meet with the staff at the publishing house, for example. Writers cannot just sit through such meetings sucking their thumbs!
You may be the kind of person who seeks out solitude by virtue of your personality. That’s OK, if – and only if – there is a solid rationale for it. Of course, you have the need for some interaction for mental health reasons, if nothing else. You also need friends, although not hordes of them. There are telephones. There’s email. There’s the social media.
Therefore, if you really are a happy introvert, you still need social skills in order to socialize on occasion.
Should it so happen that your personality dictates that you’re a “closet extrovert”, and you do not realize it! If that’s the case, you will feel extreme discontent. Extroverts– even “closet extroverts”–not only have a need, but also a craving for social input. Others around you’ll serve to reinforce those qualities that make you who you really are as a person, if only you could be led to believe that. The others do want to meet you, despite that negative self-talk you preach to yourself when alone.
Irrational Beliefs about the Self and Social Skills
There’s a very large school of psychology devoted to cognitive behavioral theory. It’s a field fed by the clinical research and anecdotal studies. Some of the most famous names associated with this field are: JS Beck, DD Burns, Butler, and Albert Ellis for all their books and work in the field.
There’s great wisdom in what they have said regarding the role of irrational thoughts in engendering fear in social situations. These are fears that do not mean you’re “crazy”. They are fears founded upon emotional and mental misinterpretations you have amassed through the years. Wrong learning like that can have devastating effects on your social skills unless you recognize that it’s like a sheep dressed up in the fur of a wolf!
Such irrational thoughts may have become a system of beliefs that you apply to yourself and to social circumstances.
Examples of Irrational Beliefs about Yourself:
Examples of Irrational Beliefs about Social Interactions:
You may also feel that those things others say about you’re true. Perhaps you heard that Dexter thinks you’re a snob. Perhaps you heard that Jane thinks you’re clever. Do you adopt those opinions as true? Because you have a natural need for the esteem of others, as indicated by the behavioral psychologists, you’ll feel anxiety if those opinions others have of you do not match your own.
However, there is a paradox built into this. Mary may think you’re a little dull and boring, but nice. Felix, on the other hand, may think you’re quite stimulating. You like and respect both of those people. So, what do you conclude? You must conclude that in social gatherings sometimes you come across as dull and boring, but nice; and sometimes you come across as stimulating. There’s always an outlying possibility that both of them are wrong! The upshot of this is to recognize that the opinions of others are always colored by their own perceptions and state of mind. And so are yours, by the way!
Refer to that list of positive characteristics you resurrected from deep within you. These are the qualities of the real you that need to be nurtured and developed. Other people may or may not recognize them in you. What’s more, those other people may tend to view a lot of other people in a negative light. That does not make them right.
Of course, if you think too highly of yourself or you’re a narcissist, you could have the wrong opinion of yourself. You could take those positive attributes you believe you have and totally exaggerate them. You can be an egotist. However, reader, you are not! You’re someone who’s in the process of rediscovering who you really are, without the labels others assign to you.
You’re not like Narcissus who stares in the water and sees a superstar. You’re the person who looks into the water and sees what’s really there, a social animal with correct skills. You’re the kind of individual who accepts what you see. You’re the one who chooses to change some things about yourself, but NEVER to change the total reality of who you are. If you could do that, it would amount to self-betrayal. It would also confuse your friends and family terribly!
In a word, it’s too extreme to make major changes. There’s a LOT in you that’s beautiful, but you have turned a blind eye to it.